Friday, May 13, 2011

Rapture or Inferno?

Hairy-Chested Liberals Exult: Big Question, Who Do We Kill Next? by Alexander Cockburn includes the following:

We’ve only got a week. Then, as I reported in this Diary two weeks ago, it’s all over. May 21 at around 6pm Pacific Time. Swig that martini down quickly for that's the hour when the Rev Harold Camping, the preacher from Oakland, California, is predicting the Second Coming. At about 6pm, he estimates 2 per cent of the world's population will be immediately "raptured" to Heaven, with the 98 per cent bustled off to the Inferno, doomed to listen to broadcasts of Thomas Friedman’s columns for all eternity. “We're not talking about a ball game, or a marriage, or graduating from college,” Camping emphasizes,  “We're talking about the end of the world, a matter of being eternally dead, or being eternally alive, and it's all coming to a head right now."

So, lets start a little pool. Who's going to get rapture, and who's going to get inferno?

Me, I've always felt that all the kind, generous peaceful hippies I know are going to get rapture. Meanwhile, I've also always felt that the sort of Christians who support war, torture, murder, and destruction are in for a big surprise should their long awaited day of rapture indeed arrive. Likewise all the Christians who support tax cuts for the wealth at the expense of programs that aid the less fortunate. Can you really picture Jesus supporting budget cuts for the needy in order to for the rich to get richer?

The Rev. Camping would seem to agree, if you look at his numbers. He says about 2% will be saved by the rapture. Well, if you look at American election results, that seems to track very well with the 2% or so of Americans who vote for candidates like McKinney or Nader in American elections. But, it definitely doesn't agree with the 40% or so who vote for McCain and Palin and who so loudly proclaim their Christian-hood. If the Rev. Camping is indeed correct, then it looks like all those wealthy, Christian McCain voters who support war and torture are indeed going to have a rough time fitting through that eye of a needle come rapture day.

It also doesn't seem to bode well for all those Obama voters who think that supporting a Democratic War on Terror over a Republican War on Terror will get them into heaven. Not by Rev. Camping's numbers.

Lets take a look at some more famous names

Barrack Obama -- Inferno. If it was close before, and it probably wasn't, then surely ordering an assasination a few days before the rapture tilted the scales against him. I have a hard time picturing Jesus welcoming to heaven a man who just ordered a cold-blooded execution. If Obama gets rapture, then all those good Catholic Mafia bosses are probably getting in as well. Seems like that would kinda ruin the place.

George W. Bush -- Inferno. Of course. This one wasn't even close. The man has the blood of over a million people on his hands.

Joe Biden. -- Inferno. The Senator from Mastercard finally gets his final bill. Included will be the price for a lifelong support for war and destruction and torture.

Dick Cheney --- Inferno. But really, isn't it more likely that he's always been one of Satan's minions sent to earth to try to lead others into his evil course of war and murder for the benefit of the wealthy?

Nancy Pelosi -- Inferno. A young Nancy Pelosi might have had a chance. But, she long ago abandoned any human decency in her quest for personal power. She's become a strong supporter of the bankers, a strong supporter of war and torture. She made sure the wars continued during her time as speaker, which means there's a lot of blood on her hands. She'll probably try to argue about the good she did when she was young, but that's an awful lot of blood on her hands.

Cynthia McKinney -- Rapture. She's spent her life fighting for peace and justice. Since she and Pelosi were once both left-wing back-benchers, she shows that there was another path for the Pelosi's of the world to follow. Cynthia's a no brainer. And, it also reinforces the percentages that Rev. Camping is putting forward, as about 2% of Americans seem to support Cynthia, while the other 98% have all been convinced by the corporate media that this decent and kind person is some sort of devil incarnate.

Ralph Nader -- Rapture. Because of Ralph, no one can say that there hasn't been a choice on recent US Presidential ballots. If someone has voted for the candidates of war, murder and torture, then they can't say there wasn't another choice. Mr. Nader has spent his adult life trying to keep people from being killed or screwed by corporate greed and power.

Who else? Add some names in the comments. Although, I have to admit that for almost all American politicians who's names you know, the likely answer appears to be "Inferno". But not everyone. Who are the exceptions who don't have blood on their hands, and who haven't screwed over someone to make bigger profits for their wealthy contributors?


Mayra said...

Did anyone see the picture of the controversial billboard that was recently put up by another spiritual group near Family Radio’s headquarters? It directly challenges them about May 21. Here is a picture of it:

Samson said...


Hey, you're wrong. The world's not going to end on the day you say it will end because its going to end on the day we say it will end.


At least we can be an entertaining group of monkeys, well at least when we don't start killing each other over things like who's right about which day the world will end.

Maybe how that's we go out in a blaze of glory. One giant fight over exactly which day the world will end .... which causes the end of the world.

Who's got dates in the jackpot pool? Send me money now, we'll pay the jackpot after the world ends.